Post-Coital Dysphoria
May 11, 2021, by Psychosexology W/ Gayatri
When it comes to sex, many people find it exciting thing to have, but do you really know that sex might end up making you feel sad sometimes? Sex is meant to make you feel satisfied, but there can be condition where you feel sad and stressful after sex. This condition is known as Postcoital Dysphoria (PCD) which is also known as Postcoital Tristesse (PCT). So, what does it really mean??
Post-coital dysphoria (PCD) is a condition that can cause feelings of sadness, agitation and crying after intercourse or any bad feeling like shame, guilt or regret. It can also cause feelings of anxiety. It can happen both during & after any form of physical intimacy, not just sex. And one can go through these feelings even if sex was loving, satisfying & enjoyable or even if one fully achieved orgasm. People with postcoital dysphoria might not understand why they feel this way and cannot explain the reason.
PCD can last anywhere from 5 minutes to 2 hours, and it can happen with or without orgasm.
What causes this???
Stress and anxiety
If you are feeling anxious in your day to day life or if you are stressed because of other life issues, then this might be the reason, which can lead to PCD. You might think that you are enjoying physical pleasure but, you just feel that only becuase your mind is distracted for a while but, the moment you hit the reality, you again start feeling anxious. As long as we have sex, our mind is caught up in it, and it doesn't allow us to think about all other factors. But after the enjoyment of sensual pleasure is passed, the greatest sadness follows. You go from absolute joy and pleasure to being separated. After that pleausrable state you suddenly fall into reality and again get connected with all the chaos in your mind.
History of abuse
Have you ever been a victim of sexual abuse??? Then there is a high chance that some sexual activities might trigger the same feeling in you which you had gone through when you were abused and can lead to make you sad and uncomfortable even after having good and consensual sex with your partner.
Hormonal changes
When you have sex, your body releases hormones like dopamine, oxytocin. After, sexual encounter, the levels of all these hormones drop down. And that can trigger emotional changes and can make you feel sad.
Relationship with your partner
No matter how good your sex life is, but if there are so some issues and misunderstandings between you and your partner, then it will definitely affect how you feel during and after sex. Emotional connection does affect your sex life as mind and body share a great relation. So, if there is something which is bothering you about your partner or relationship like insecurity, loneliness, then, this might be the reason you are feeling sad and left out after sex.
Your opinion about sex and your body
If you are the one who think sex is bad thing or see it like a sin or feel shameful to do it, then it might make you feel bad after sex. If you have negative self image or body image issues, then you might feel uncomfortable during sex and you won't be able to enjoy it as you are worried about your looks and appearance all time during sex. This might end up leaving you sad and unsatisfied.
What to do if you are going through this??
Let me tell you, whatever your feelings are, know that they’re totally valid. You aren’t imagining them, and you aren’t “weird” for having them. Feeling anxious and stressed about sex is little usual sometimes. Everyone is little anxious about their looks and all other factors when they have sex. But, if these things persists for long time and makes you feel sad everytime you have sex. Then, it is definitely a problem.
So, what you can do????
Talk to your partner
Your bonding with your partner plays a very important role in makeing you feel satisfied during sex. So, share your issues with your partner and try to solve it together. Tell them what is bothering you or which things are making you anxious in bed. If there are some sexual activites that are making you feel uncomfortable then, let your partner know.
Take help of counselor
Sometimes the person who has PCD is unable to find out what is the reason behind their sadness and anxiety. This is because, sometimes reason behind all lies in your childhood trauma, events, emotions which are triggering your anxiety.So,
you should definitely seek the help of counselor.
Talk to sex educator
Sex Educator can definitely help you out by suggesting certain sexual actvities than can help you to relieve stress and decreses anxiety and in turn can help you to enjoy sex.
Hormonal changes
When you have sex, your body releases hormones like dopamine, oxytocin. After, sexual encounter, the levels of all these hormones drop down. And that can trigger emotional changes and can make you feel sad.
Relationship with your partner
No matter how good your sex life is, but if there are so some issues and misunderstandings between you and your partner, then it will definitely affect how you feel during and after sex. Emotional connection does affect your sex life as mind and body share a great relation. So, if there is something which is bothering you about your partner or relationship like insecurity, loneliness, then, this might be the reason you are feeling sad and left out after sex.
Your opinion about sex and your body
If you are the one who think sex is bad thing or see it like a sin or feel shameful to do it, then it might make you feel bad after sex. If you have negative self image or body image issues, then you might feel uncomfortable during sex and you won't be able to enjoy it as you are worried about your looks and appearance all time during sex. This might end up leaving you sad and unsatisfied.
What to do if you are going through this??
Let me tell you, whatever your feelings are, know that they’re totally valid. You aren’t imagining them, and you aren’t “weird” for having them. Feeling anxious and stressed about sex is little usual sometimes. Everyone is little anxious about their looks and all other factors when they have sex. But, if these things persists for long time and makes you feel sad everytime you have sex. Then, it is definitely a problem.
So, what you can do????
Talk to your partner
Your bonding with your partner plays a very important role in makeing you feel satisfied during sex. So, share your issues with your partner and try to solve it together. Tell them what is bothering you or which things are making you anxious in bed. If there are some sexual activites that are making you feel uncomfortable then, let your partner know.
Take help of counselor
Sometimes the person who has PCD is unable to find out what is the reason behind their sadness and anxiety. This is because, sometimes reason behind all lies in your childhood trauma, events, emotions which are triggering your anxiety.So,
you should definitely seek the help of counselor.
Talk to sex educator
Sex Educator can definitely help you out by suggesting certain sexual actvities than can help you to relieve stress and decreses anxiety and in turn can help you to enjoy sex.
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